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ADHD, Pumpkin Spice, Actioning Demands and Dopamine Infused Mind Wandering (STIM)ulations :-)

It’s pumpkin spice time! Leaves the colour of fire are beginning their journey, pirouetting to the acorn littered ground…

Just like the chronic state of my AUTHD mind - It’s that glorious time of ‘inbetween’ - neither here, nor there. It’s the time between processing a demand and making the connection of what needs to be done, and actioning the healthy defences modes and motivation to make those demands happen. It’s the season, unlike any other…

The season of Autumn, after the hot baking sunshine and salty seas of summer, and the period before the icy duvet days of winter, snuggled on our sofas; is a season of unique power over an autistic person like myself. Why? It’s the stories, told with added sprinkles of … ‘pumpkin spice’ the additional embellishment and exaggeration that is used to motivate curious ears and inspire our imagination.

Autumn is the harvest, Halloween, and natural realm of growth and death, where we can wrap ourselves in the softest of blankets and drink up all those tales that get told around the bonfires, a mug of hot, pumpkin spiced chocolate in our relaxed grasp.

Oh yes! It’s the season of pumpkin spice and all things nice! It’s the season that our childhood nostalgia seems to remember fondly. Dancing around a fire pit, roasted marshmallows and pumpkin spiced pies as your parents or grandparent told spooky stories around the dancing flames of the Bon fire, glitter and sparks brazen in the smoky air, casting an enchanting dreamscape to the world around you as their stories of pumpkin spice come to life.

How do we add the pumpkin spice into actioning our demands or our side quests, like these stories of myth and folklore do?

Pumpkin spice makes everything so much more… exciting (even boring routine chores and demands!).

Do you remember that childhood awe when listening to those stories? Gazing at our grandparents in wonder when they told us stories of old with embellished pumpkin spice sprinkled throughout? Back then we didn’t think they were lying or exaggerating per se, but looking back we know that their stories were magical because of that extra pumpkin spice and exaggerations or blatant white lies, that they added to the narrations, to make it that much more exciting, magical, and inspiring.

Motivating an ADHD brain is much like those embezzled pumpkin spice filled stories of our childhood; Santa, the Easter bunny, and above all else the myths and folk lore of Halloween, witches, fairy’s, spirits and magic. Such stories, motivate my brain with a mind wandering stimulation that empowers my theory of mind and morality in relationships… it was invaluable to me growing up.

You know those stories- how they walked through miles of snow and forest to get to school everyday. How they cycled through the forest and entered the realm of brown bears and had a tea party. Then there would be slightly more realistic stories that were magical even without the pumpkin spice, How their ancestors harvested and planting for hours everyday, the hours spent outside amongst picturesque fairy tales where they made dens and how they’d carve out Pumpkins and fill them with light to ward of negative energy and wrong doers. All followed by that funny blossoming of realisation that our elders, were once a child full of wonder, too. Once so naive, where now they are so wise. It’s lends us the faith that we too, can improve with time and ageing gracefully.

The importance of storytelling…

People like me, who are ADHD may need a little “pumpkin spice” every now and then to help motivate them - something that adds an interesting zest to a demand or activity that has become too routine. These beautiful stories - their memories of their own childhood bedtime stories and folklore - take us into the world of imagination and help us process information and demand on a back burner. Our mind is enabled with ‘Mind Wandering (STIM)ulations, helping us process the world, humanity’s diversity, and its demands in a safe way. With these pumpkin spice stories, we set sail, we jump into crystal pools, we trek the burning deserts, we sludge through snowy mountain peaks, our cheeks burning red with cold. We gain an empathy and compassion and understanding of lives unlike our own- theory of mind developing as we dig holes and bury seeds and sprinkle water and harvest together; reaping the rewards for our community to share - even though, us city kids survival is not based on such natural outcomes, but rather that of capitalism and cityscapes. With pumpkin spice of storytelling, that sound like fantasy - but also teach us about relationships and consent and team work and morality and survival - we learn to cherish the very real fruit and vegetable seeds, and the pumpkin seeds and the bounty that supports our outer community of people just like us. We city kids, are not reliant on the harvest and yet as kids we are with them, harvesting, learning and growing within their ancestral ‘Pumpkin spiced’ stories too - because the story motivates us to learn about lives so different to our own. This enchanted me as a kid. There were children my age who were harvesting fields and growing those vegetables themselves – a new way of life I had never before understood to be possible, became reality. Through stories I could imagine a lived reality different to my own, and put myself in their shoes. Much like I did with learning about ancient history.

Why is pumpkin spice so exciting for so many Autistic or ADHD people?

Because it’s so… SPICY! It’s the instant gratification of newness - It adds much needed seasoning to the otherwise bland food that we consume to make it that much more special and exciting! Otherwise - it adds an interesting twist to our usual routines, stimulates our ADHD need for spontaneity and instant gratification while easing the Autistic side with regularity. Best of all, if you’re to take this literally, pumpkin spice is limited edition to coffee and cake shops especially for autumnal seasons! This limited edition special ‘one time’ only surprise of ‘pumpkin spice’ whether literally or metaphorically can make the stories, the coffees and hot chocolates and muffins and storytimes instructional for demands, that much more motivating to comply with and enjoy.

My ADHD loves to relish amongst the fantasy world - and it chases dreams and sparkly things by looking for unique experiences and instant reward. Pumpkin spice, because of its limited timeframe, is a unique experience.

While the reward and instant gratification could come in the form of indulging in a cute hot coffee infused with pumpkin spice, or a muffin topped with orange pumpkin spice flakes, I prefer pumpkin spice in the form of something more fantastical - something built within my own mind. It must be utilised as part of my weekly routine, but beware! Just like the post it notes sprinkling the room to tell us of our step by step routine to follow in the morning, ‘post its’ become so regularly seen that we end up not processing the visuals at all (therefore the ‘post its’ lose purpose), adding too much pumpkin spice and interesting twists into regular routines and demands can back fire too! Keeping things new and interesting is difficult when you’re also tending to the autism side which doesn’t like change or spontaneity.

Hey, what I can I say? I said it was pumpkin spice and magic, not that it would be an easy fix!

Either way, pumpkin spice is all about the story telling, and how you encourage someone to do a task or demand or action their to do list.

This story telling grows as we transition from child to adult and with it the pumpkin spice in stories serve a different purpose - where once they could inspire wonder and curiosity and a developed theory of mind for perspectives and lived reality different to our own, as older children and adults the pumpkin spice helps motivate us to work within our best capabilities too.

Every year during the gorgeous orange and reds of the autumnal slumbers we see picture after picture of pumpkin patches and harvest celebrations - all flourished together with a bow - with a center piece pumpkin, glowing from the inside, to manifest for something new and beautiful.

As an Autistic, chronically ill and disabled advocate, I don’t have a lot of energy to write or work or advocate – even if I want to do it full time, I can only safely advocate or write or ponder new ways to help a few hours every month. Anything more than that and my prefrontal cortex shuts down (I think) and I get sick, extreme all over pain in all my bones, muscles, joints and organs and Ill be fainting and having seizures even just trying to remember basic information like my own name. Motivating myself can be difficult, when I know in my heart it is dangerous too due to my diseases (this is a reality that isn’t necessary common for Autistic people, although actioning demands and motivating ourselves as Autistic people is difficult in a whole myriad of other ways too).

Without the ‘Pumpkin Spice’ and new spontaneity to my usual routine for finding advocacy ideas and energy to write, I wouldn’t have written this blog or got out of my comfort zone to achieve something new and exciting. Here in this Blogs photo, I found myself doing the same as all the others; I found myself a part of the world of Pumpkins, to try and motivate myself to advocate in a safe way. The only way to motivate myself to do something autumnal related was to emerge myself in it. Create those stories within my head, see and smell and feel the pumpkins, taste the spice and smoke of the bonfires and remember the nostalgia of all the pumpkin spice in those stories that made those tasks of sitting still and doing chores so memorable and motivating. For example, as a child at an Autumnal bonfire with my family, I was a strong fairy adding crates of wood to the massive fire pit- without the pumpkin spice story, I wouldn’t have wanted, or had energy to help. With the pumpkin spice storytelling that inspired my imagination, I was a warrior princess adding fire to send a smoke and light signal for all around to send us help and positivity. Otherwise, I would have just been, Joely, tired, in pain, overwhelmed and really wanting to get out of there!

In my own work and my own life I have to make it clear that the pumpkin spice (when it’s a literal physical thing, like an indulgence, an activity or special recovery time) will not be a regular event. A routine of pumpkin spice is a good idea; special recovery time infused with pumpkin spice could be making a sensory den and having a movie night (as apposed to just sitting and watching movies). It could be a quiet soft blanket corner surrounded by plushies where someone can just read a new book (as apposed to just being surrounded by plushies). It could be an activity or game that they were looking forward to exploring-something easy going and not too hard to focus on… pumpkin spice could even be in the realms of art or music or sensory play or socialising (as opposed to doing a chore or moving on to the next demand, they take time to celebrate their effort, dance and make marks through art and sensory play to infuse the experience associated with demands and chores with dopamine release, that makes them feel good about their experiences, rather than relieved it’s over.)!

Adding pumpkin spice to my daily chore list makes the demand so much easier for autistic and adhd mind to process and actually *do it*.

What’s better? Telling myself I need to ‘go shopping’ or telling myself I need to ‘protect the realm, by exchanging goods for a magical plastic slice’? What’s better? Telling myself as I glide around the shop in my wheelchair, that every person is an elf on their own quest of protection, and I’m just here to navigate around their emotional disasters and try not to infect myself or my butterfly’s, with trauma, OR is it better that I, become overwhelmed by the public scowls, stares, glares, muttered indifference, avoidance and huffs of impatience and pure discrimination, and the additional sensory and energy onslaught of the horror of a grocery shop?!

What’s better? Making life A quest in a Fantasy novel where my thoughts are the magic, or being boring and focusing of the overwhelm as if it was my fault and avoidable if I were ‘better’?!

Making my life be filled with side quests and pumpkin spice is the way forward for me?

If I have a job or chore to do, I’ll add pumpkin spice to make it more interest and motivate me to start. “Do this job, and reward yourself. You can add to your kindness and effort tracker and you can also get *pumpkin spice* in the form of - extra rest and recovery time, a reasonable inside / outside activity of your choice for up to an hour (say “yes!” time), (not to be confused with bribery).

As a writer and a hugely imaginary person, For me, I motivate myself to do a chore by saying, “I’ll do the washing up, but instead of being bored of doing the washing up, I’m going to create a fantasy world in my head- a kingdom filled with water, and towers of plates and cups, each creature that lives there is a bubble, that form together to protect their city from the hands of destruction!” Or I’ll imagine that the plates and cups in the sink are actually mosaic like art work seen from miles in the sky in a fantasy land where the world is covered in water and bowls and cutlery make up a glorious mosaic, telling the story of cutlery of the long past who once lived on shelves. Whatever it is, I take my mind off the chore itself, with pure fantasy enabling me to mind wander and stim within my minds eye until the chore is done and I’m happy enough and motivated to do the next thing. Sometimes you just need a bit of pumpkin spice!

Another bit of pumpkin spice for my work life is to create an outdoor office - I get so stifled by the walls of an indoor office and I find creativity comes in abundance if I can mind map and plan and organise and write in an outdoor comforts ale setting with beauty and abundance and nature all around me to inspire. Guess what inspired this post? Yup! A whole lot of pumpkins and crunchy autumn leaves!

Autistic and ADHD brains neurologically perceives rewards diversely to non Autistic counterparts. I believe, based on my own research, that we perceive everything fact first, almost in half, we process half the facts and logic now, half later, and after that we process the emotions and the good memories. AUTHD brains require a different reward system to actually kick start the dopamine release that we also lack after accomplishing a task or trying to achieve a task.

This means that little rewards are not so impactful but it also means that long awaited rewards may not trigger the brains happy healthy drugs (Dopamine and Serotonin in!) as much either!

Also if we perceive rejection in the mix those rewards get overshadowed completely! There’s no point organising a celebration party if you’re also going to get annoyed about something unrelated because their ADHD brain will perceive that as a rejection of their efforts and it’ll ignite sensitivity dysphoria.

In many cases, of you don’t create save accessible rewards - ADHD people ‘self medicate’ so to speak, in order to get that Dopamine hit they turn to adrenaline infused things that kick start with a thrash - lots of

Energy drinks, maybe over working at the gym or if they are unsupported they may turn to gambling drugs and all the toxic parts of sex drugs and rock and roll!

The problem is when cultivating a reward system we must make the root of it based on their good intentions and efforts. That no matter what, if they tried, they are worthy. Rewards are not based on accomplishing those to do lists or task but rather an effort.

Likewise we don’t punish lack of accomplishment because not achieving does not equal no effort to do their best.

Every effort should be rewarded and validated emotionally for the big pumpkin slices rewards to be healthily processed and used to motivate in the future.

Many autistic ADHD people like me have seriously low self esteem. And that’s because we are often taught to ignore our struggles in favour of a mask and focus on our savant like gifts if we have them.

The problem with hiding from your hardships and pretending you’re not autistic or struggling is that the root of true self confidence is your relationship with what you are BAD at - not what you are good at. It’s how you treat yourself when you fail and make mistakes and that is also cultivated and learnt from loved ones teachers and role models around you who punish or reward or gaslight your lack of accomplishments failure or mistakes.

Likewise, this dysphoria can start young - as children - chronically being misunderstood by others and “punished” in even though you tried your best is soul destroying when you’re trying your best and a justice seeker. It’s not our faults we need a different set of reasonable adjustments to the norm, to achieve things or that our effort can often look like ‘one step forward, three back’ or ‘half a job completed, in twice the amount of time’ .

In this way dopamine hits and pumpkin spice type rewards should be fun and reflect who the autistic person are and what they value.

Having visual boards really help. Kindness trackers. Energy and effort trackers and lots of mini tasks that lead to a big task. You processed a job needed doing TICK! You had a good intention to do the job at a healthy time for you TICK You scheduled a time to do the task TICK. You picked up the sponge TICK you turned the hot tap on TICK you squirted the hot water and soap onto dishes TICK. If they get distracted or exhausted halfway through doesn’t de mean their efforts so far- their effort was still there. Seeing the visual progress and process of what helps, can help us make sense of our efforts and values and better adjust our to do list, rewards and what it means to accomplish them.

Pumpkin spice can be found in our values too- instead of demands like “you must do this task by this time or else you will be in trouble and you haven’t tried hard enough!” Validate, be gentle and Judgement free and keep goals open ended “this person you love, is really stressed and it would help them feel less stressed if they had one less thing on their to do list- could you find a safe time to manage this task to help them feel less stressed please? Anytime this week would be hugely appreciated, and we would so greatful for your effort and good intentions!”

Pumpkin Spice and Mind Wandering (STIM)ulations and why we process demands slower Sometimes, a bit of pumpkin spice can ease me and motivate me and let my mind wandering stimulations heal me, too. Mind Wandering (STIM)ulations, are important for many Autistic people because (I believe that) everything is processed on a back burner. If you imagine every component to our senses, all the things we see, hear, taste or feel on our skin, all that is processed in bubbles – there’s so much information that the bubble is really big and filled with smaller bubbles that represent each sense. If you also imagine that all emotions, all interoceptive or inner-feelings are also processed in separate bubbles, too, you can imagine how easily those bubbles pop or separate into tiny bubbles, if they get too big or are filled with too much information. All routine is processed through bubbles too. everything in our reality is processed through bubbles. For a non-autistic person, they process these bubbles in one go, at the same time and at the same speed, because they don’t process an overwhelming amount of information and it is safe for them to process all bubbles in one go, so they can make connections based on those bubbles of processed information. For Autistic people it’s more complex because we process (hypothetically) potentially up to 68% more information that non-autistic people. This means, that to protect us from harm, our body and minds, makes us process information differently – to try and avoid shutdown and overwhelm. In this way, our bubbles of information is often split into sub sections, so all the bubbles break apart into smaller bubbles, where only some of the necessary bubbles gets processed now, and most of the bubbles are processed later. This means that only half of the bubbles containing information on ‘how to action a to do list’ is processed now, including only half of the instructions to action a demand, and the rest of those step by step guides and information to help us process our needs to do what we need to do. Most of this additional information that is deemed as unsafe to process in the immediate moment, must be empowered to be processed with reasonable adjustments and accessibility later on too. To help with this background processing, we must create a safe space to process that is sensory friendly, but also adheres to our ADHD, and our Autism. This is where Mind Wandering (STIM)ulations comes into it – which is basically a semi controlled daydream that allows for back ground processing to take place, while actioning a menial task or thought. Literally, while day dreaming is harmful and distracting for non-Autistic people, it helps ADHD and Autistic people focus and process information and make better connections, because it empowers us to process what we need in a safe way. By processing information on a back burner with creativity and storytelling we can process the demands and action a to do list or make connections better.

Why is pumpkin spice important for gratification, dopamine and being motivated to celebrate our efforts before our next task?

Because generally Autistic or ADHD people don’t experience ‘natural’ pumpkin spice in life like neurotypical people do because we process all emotions and information and demands and gratification differently, and through a different survival based lenses. Neurotypical people can process needs, demands and success to thrive, whereas we process to survive and there fore the processing to celebrate and feel pride or challenge our defend mode is much harder to connect within an autistic or ADHD mind.

For example - to my autistic or ADHD friends - Have you ever finished a task - accomplished something and instantly felt the dizzying bubbling glee and pride that dances within you soul? Have you had it glitter within you, the moment you finished and that glow shines within you for minutes, days, even weeks?

No? Me neither.

Welcome to the club! It’s pretty numb here, but this club is not only exclusive to Autistic or ADHD people!

From my experience and my professional research o believe that Autistic and ADHD specifically can impact how we process our achievements or tasks clearance.

When neurotypical people, may get a sense of achievement after completing something, ADHD people I have noticed, tend to just feel relief and then they move on. This is because ADHD or Autistic brains tend to buzz us into the next task, because their brains cannot process too much newness in one go. To protect ourselves from overwhelm our brain flits us from thought to thought, half processing our needs, feelings and emotions and information around us, before processing the next load. When a feeling is new, especially, it represents a change, and often our brain recognise that changes scares us and shuts us down – it cannot recognise that this change of feeling pride and celebratory is a GOOD change! So it stifles it and distracts us, by flitting our thoughts onto the next half demand or butterfly to process. It’s like “I published a book. What’s next?’ ‘I achieved that grade I wanted. Now what’

‘I moved out of home. What now?’

There’s a few research studies hypothesising that this lack of celebration in AUTHD people is to do with our lack receptors for Dopamine and Serotonin .

Whether this is true or not is still yet to be studied, however if it is, and even if it isn’t, I have a neurospicy brain hack to make us feel a greater sense of accomplishment - because it can help us feel a moment of happiness, either way, if we trust it to.

Here we go!

Giggle, smile, spin around, wave your arms, make your self wobbly, dance, to the cancan, do some lip trills… make yourself laugh. The sillier it is, the more effective it is in enhancing your vagal tone and tricking your neurotransmitters into releasing the happiness hormones that we may or may not be missing after accomplishments!

Whether the cause of us not feeling jubilant or celebratory is because we don’t process information. Or our feelings to realise it, or because our brains flit away before we can really think or feel celebratory, or whether it’s the lack of Serotonin and dopamine released or whether it’s both and more, giving ourselves extra time to process our achievement and let us just sit with it mindfully for awhile can help us connect how we really feel it.

For example. I love delivering speeches for my advocacy and work - one thing I’ve noticed is that I could deliver a speech, it go perfectly, get a standing ovation from hundreds of people the moment I’m finished and… I won’t feel that erupting of glee within me. I need to replay it in my mind over and over to convince myself that I should be proud of myself that I did do well and I did accomplish something pretty cool. On those few seconds after a speech ends, you’ll see me smile but you won’t see me buzzing with prideful glee at accomplishment it. Days later you will though. For neurotypical people apparently this is not so common and yet I’ve rarely met an autistic or ADHD person who doesn’t struggle with feeling a sense of accomplishment or pride or happiness or motivation to do more to get better. So curious?

RSD plays a part and the mask of professionalism too but generally if I feel it I let myself I don’t hide behind a mask. The reason I’m only smiling and not dancing around with stims of glee is because I don’t feel it in that moment. It takes me longer to feel it even though it’s in me.

To initiate this feeling I have to remind myself and process it later. With the magic suggested. I have to ask a lot for validation and confirmation that I did so well and I did accomplish something. It can look like having a huge ego when you’re constantly like ‘hey didn’t I do so well! Look at me I accomplished this cool thing’ for like a month after wards, where as in reality you’re simply processing those positive emotions that other people would have processed immediately. It’s not ego and it’s not being numb to emotions , it may not even be alexithymia although this is likely linked, it’s just processing so much slower.

Practising this magic as part of a routine and habit before during and after accomplishments or efforts can really help you feel (incredibly, hilariously VERY SILLY) but also much more prideful and receptive to those positive feelings you deserve to feels for your accomplishments and efforts.

Pumpkin Spice, can be found in these Mind Wandering (STIM)ulations, activated by the simple art of changing up what your body expects of you – if you actively do celebratory things even though you feel dull or sad, making yourself dance around, giggle, make butterflies with your hands, wiggle, you may be able to trick your mind into feeling amused, and then happier (– even for the briefest blip of relief), and associate your efforts and achievements with positive feelings instead of the numbness we may be used to – thus, motivating us to action our to do list later, when we need to.

Pumpkin spice can also be a way of practising mindfulness - it is for me, sometimes instead of fantasy worlds, I practise just existing in the moment.

If while washing dishes, I think only of the next thing after I finish, I am not existing while washing the dishes - I am a shell who is not alive within my mind in that moment. That time where I could be learning or improving or feeling peace is wasted because I’m so busy anticipating the next cool / boring thing. Things like this can make the impact of pumpkin spice quite contradictory - I wish to live in the moment and not only be motivated to do good things because I will get something out of it.

We should not teach kids to do chores by motivating them with money or reward, but we should teach kids to do chores as a way of showing respect and care for the people helping us, by helping them feel happier and more peaceful by helping them with the chores. Turning a demand into a way of showing care and love turns it into a life lesson of empathy and improved theory of mind- without shame or manipulation the kids will eventually learn that, they have the power within them to help change a life for the better- by helping with chores as much as they are currently capable to! Instead of reward based, it’s based in a real understanding of their impact on the people around them.

Likewise to only doing chores or boring things to get a reward can be unhealthy if it’s used ALL the time (this is why pumpkin spice is best utilised when it is a rare special opportunity so it’s not taken advantage of or becomes less special) likewise to this fleeting problem solving that vanishes in later life- If we focus only on the next task or even the reward that awaits us, we become a puppet, we go through the motions, our mind switches off, mind and body moving out of sync as we hurry onwards to get the dishes out of the way to get to the next thing.

If we treat ourselves to a pumpkin spice reward - we must get ourselves in the mind frame to enjoy and benefit from it too. If we are indulging in a pumpkin spice coffee but while we drink the coffee we are thinking of eating the cake, we fail to savour the gentle spice of the coffee. If we only focus on finishing the chores, we don’t live in those moments that could otherwise teach us. If we feel the boredom and the pain of existence and sadness of watching the autumnal leaves fall from the tree through the kitchen window as we wash dishes, we will fight with our minds to distract ourselves, believing that feeling negative is bad and should be avoided, when really our negative emotions could help us exist in the moment and grow too. We need to practise the art of truly existing in the moment and truly being alive and not just surviving. We are not alive during the time we are washing the dishes or drinking coffee if we are focused on the next task or reward. I believe that if we are in this mind set of ‘next next next’ we are never able to understand the magic of life and it’s emotional journey, while standing at the sink or drinking our pumpkin spices lattes.

In all this want for the future, for what’s next, never celebrating our efforts or actualising the true beauty of pumpkin spice and mindfulness of our efforts, we are plummeted and dumped away into the future, where our current self is merely a shell, existing to survive and not thrive—isn’t it better to thrive? At the midst of mindful pumpkin spice, and not the expectation of ‘next next next?’

Mindfully immersing myself in the current moment, enabled me to think outside the pumpkin shape box- and instead of the usual pumpkin patches, I put myself inside the pumpkin! Instead of carving out pumpkins and putting the lights inside, like a Jack-O-Lantern, in this example I am the light and the pumpkin is a representation of my fears, scooped out, until who I really am can be the light filled center, that glows to attract the good in life.

We are all the essence of harvest and growth and stories and beauty.

One such story for me - was that of the pumpkin seeds - the pumpkin, who like me, was so afraid of the dark, that no child dared plant it.

Pumpkin seed, so afraid of the dark.

Afraid of being carved and scooped afraid of being planted to renewal

We are like those pumpkin seeds. We prefer a comfortable lie, to a fearful truth. We see the horrors everyday and go so numb to it. We see death and destruction and the reality’s of the horror season, all year round and yet we cannot fathom how to change and March to the end of destruction without putting ourselves in emotional or physical danger too. We cannot bare to put ourselves through darkness because there’s no guarantee of light on the other side.

It makes trying, and finding pumpkin spice difficult.

Just like carving out a Jack-O-Lantern, You have to empty out some of yourself to be someone else’s canvas; to take a risk and try and start a to do list or create art with your actions and good intentions. so remember their demands and expectations do not always reflect the story within you of who you are, Your hopes your dreams and your potential.

Just because you struggle to complete tasks or achieve things like they expect, doesn’t mean you can’t still find pumpkin spice or light up your own Jack-O-Lantern from the inside, with just your hood intentions to try.

In life we must clean out all of the goop and negativity and put a light within us to shine. Like a pumpkin that is bright in colour and symbol of good harvest and healthy manifestations, we are also a symbol of natural abundance and growth.

So shine bright like a carved out Jack-O-Lantern Pumpkin, and chase that sparkling dopamine with Pumpkin spice if you have to- you got this!

Peace x

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