Its 2024, so its time for all those new goals to change our lives! we are hearing encouraging shouts of "new year! new me!" everywhere we look in these early days of January... For me, time limits are really hard, especially when relating to my goals for the future. Time limits don't feel safe, to achieve what I wish to, so new year goals always baffles me. If you tell me I have 5 minutes to get ready to leave the house, I'll panic, sure, but for some reason my time blindness kicks in, and I slow down. The pressure to comply gets too much and I think my prefrontal cortex shutsdown in an effort to keep up. Yet, if you tell me I have 300 seconds, it kicks starts me, and I manage to be bother quicker and more efficient in getting ready in time, because I innately know that seconds, feels less time than minutes, even thought its literally the same thing! strange? oh yes! I have many strange new habits to kick start 2024, and using open ended seconds to measure time and efforts and accomplishments in stead of deadlines, is my new sparkly thing. When it comes to mindfulness though, giving myself less time, takes a way the pressure I feel to be mindful and makes it easier, because the stress is over in only 10 seconds, and then I can start over after giving myself time to heal. in this way, it takes 10 seconds, at a time, to change your life. I'm hoping to take this with me in 2024, because it could potentially take just 10 seconds of courage at the beginning of each change or choice, that can build towards changing your life.

Just 10 seconds at a time... no need for pressure by saying we have to focus and think about and obsess over this idea or demand or things for hours a t a time to succeed, nope! that doesnt work for me, and it only shuts me down... but seconds? taking 10 seconds to think and consider and plan, and 10 seconds to recover and 10 seconds of planning again if I am able to? that could change my life.

It doesn’t matter how many 10 seconds it takes...

As long as you keep committing to making as many of those 10 seconds count towards your best self- & whatever that means for you.

🦄For example, It takes 10 seconds of courage for me to open my mouth & utter the first word of a speech, when I’m standing on stage, with butterflies anxiously fluttering within my tummy.

10 seconds before that to convince myself to walk on stage, 10 seconds of courage to take a deep breath & remind myself I can do it -& do it well.

10 seconds to imagine how my words may help the people in need.

It takes 10 seconds at a time- so make each of those 10 seconds count.

🦄I like the idea of waking up while the world sleeps - starting with 7am, then 6am, then 5am, maybe even 4am; using time wisely.

10 seconds at a time, makes it seem a little more manageable.

I love the idea of using that time to have an adventure, to grow & learn, while the world sleeps, bathed in the comforting darkness of sweet dreams.

I like the idea of waking & Being enchanted by the twinkle of stars, glittering the night sky. I dream of finding the nearest hill, & sitting at the peak wrapped up in a snuggly coat sipping a hot sweet drink, & watching the sun rise, come rain or shine.

I imagine myself Counting blessings- what I can see, touch, smell, hear, & feel grateful for, every 10 seconds as I watch the sun rise...

🦄I love the idea of Finding water & watching the world reflected within its depths & imagining the wonders of marine biology & ecosystems, as the waters ripple, with the glowing fusions of the suns colourful rise.

It took 10 seconds for each idea to blossom within my mind.

It then took 10 seconds to consider, another 10 seconds to decide, & a further 10 seconds to set my alarm to make it happen.

The rest is up to circumstances, me, my choices & actions. So I’ll try to choose how to spend my time wisely.

Give yourself 10 seconds at a time, to find what works for you-10 seconds at a time.

🦄Take 10 seconds to consider buying yourself a beautiful jar & making a list of your favourite moments from every day - the ones you want to remember.

Write everything you can remember making you smile.

Everything that made you feel proud or worthwhile.

Every inspiring story or empowering quote.

Everything.

No detail is too small-it’s all important-because you are important.

Then pop these loving notes in your jar for safe keeping.

🦄then take another 10 seconds to imagine the wonder of opening the jar & looking back at those nice memories & seeing the positive images within you mind come to life in all singing & all dancing technicolour.

Re live it, embrace it, love it. Remember & imagine the beauty & strive to make changes to empower you to feel that way again.

You’re worth it. So do it.

Make the time count.

🦄Stroke your fingers into the earth, & swirl the soil, embrace the cool feel, & inhale the earthy scent, & exhale the negativity.

Take 10 seconds to consider planting a seed.

Take another 10 seconds to imagine the journey you’d have together-seeing your success as it grows everyday, watching it bloom, learning from mistakes when it dies.

10 seconds at a time, Teaching yourself that it’s ok to fail, it is ok, not to be ok.

It’s ok to be you.

You’re not a failure, you’re a seed of what’s to come.

🦄Touch the branches of a tree & feel the veins of the leaves & embrace in the beauty of that trees story so far-the history it’s witnessed.

Take 10 seconds to imagine The love stories of happy couples from centuries gone that embraced under moonlight beneath that very tree.

Take another 10 seconds to consider learning more.

Then take the time to learn.

🦄take 10 seconds at a time to consider how to create a living space that heals.

Take 10 seconds to consider organising your bedroom, to make an accessible, clear & healing living space.

Find help, & work together; It only takes 10 seconds of courage at a time, to ask, after all.

Take 10 seconds to consider putting on some fairy lights or mood lighting.

Let flowers adorn your window sills or shower your home in a calming scent you love.

Take 10 seconds to breathe in the wonder, & let go of the hurt.

practice your deep breathing. ground yourself.

Imagine the plants life story.

Remember who you are, your life, & accept your past & that your story so far doesn’t have to be the ruler of your future.

You are in control.

🦄Take 10 seconds to consider Expressing yourself; drawing, writing, art.

create therapeutic marks that have no meaning, splash colour and shapes into paler that isn’t beautiful, make it a world of mess, or create mark making that means the world to you.

Heal through appreciation of the present moment, find therapy within the movements, the lines, curves & edges.

Don’t just do it to create art, or something beautiful, do it to express yourself & find peace. Do it because you want to.

Find the time for this creative release, when you need to.

🦄Take 10 seconds to consider how you are merely a seed of the flower yet to come.

You’re not grown yet- the current situation you’re in- whether it be negative rain or positive sunshine- can empower you to be your best.

Give yourself time to grow, to learn & love. Let yourself blossom, because with time, self acceptance & understanding you can & you will bloom-in your own special way.

You may grow to be a different type of flower to others -but you’re still a beautiful flower, none the less.

🦄Take 10 seconds to consider how to treat yourself to making those daily life chores a little more pampering.

Do the hoovering with headphones to listen to the best tunes.

wash up while watching an episode of you’re favourite light hearted tv show that makes you laugh.

Take 10 seconds to think how to make life’s jobs more accessible, more caring, then take 10 seconds at a time, to make it happen.

Use your time, wisely, & with time, you’ll blossom too. Make life’s little jobs more accessible, more caring, then take 10 seconds at a time, to make it happen.

🦄take 10 seconds to consider how to have a luxurious shower with your favourite music playing. Sing aloud into your shampoo & debate politics with your adoring public to your hearts content. Stand beneath the stream of water & Confess your most traumatising times out loud, in privacy, & allow yourself to feel your valid, real emotions & cry.

If you feel like you have no one to listen to you, yourself is the first place to start-

so talk to yourself in safe confidential privacy, to help you come to terms with it all.

(I did & it changed my life, made me understand & become stronger to reach out when I needed it most.)

🦄take 10 seconds to consider who around you could help or try to listen to you. Then find someone who will listen and help-as there’s always support somewhere & you are loved; we just need to know where to look when it’s hidden from sight.

Find understanding & acceptance that you didn’t deserve the negative abuse or trauma you may have experienced.

Then take 10 seconds out of every hour, to remind yourself of these truths.

🦄Win those lost arguments with things you wished you had said.

Feel the water on your body & find peace in the mistakes you made, find forgiveness in other people’s mistakes if it is healthy too-not because they deserve it-but because you deserve inner peace & relief.

learn, grow, empower & forgive yourself for your mistakes.

Time spent wisely, 10 seconds at a time.

🦄push yourself to go for a walk when you’re feeling low (but are capable). take your headphones, listen to your favourite music

take 10 seconds to consider smiling at strangers who walk past,

& then take 10 seconds to imagine the positive warmth of surprise at how many will smile back-

how many people you’ve helped or cheered up,

just from that simple smile of shared humanity in a world that can seem so bleak.

Take 10 seconds, & then do it. Change a life.

Be the reason for someone’s smile- it only takes 10 seconds!

🦄lie in the sunshine & feel the warmth on your skin,

stay a little longer, when the clouds come & just take 10 seconds to feel the rain splattering onto your body, feel the breeze on your face, the wet on your clothes & remind yourself that you are alive & feeling. Take 10 seconds to Remind yourself that the negativity you’re feeling now will not last forever. Take 10 seconds more to affirm go yourself that failure isn’t a bad thing. Learn & grow. Take 10 seconds, to just be, just be you with no responsibilities or past or future. Feel alive within your senses.

Take 10 seconds to just be & Learn how to love yourself again.

Take time, to Just be you.

🦄Push yourself to broaden your mind & pursue your interests.

Read a book, apply for that course, watch a documentary, book the holiday or day trip, visit the museum & attend that webinar you’re putting off going to.

Take 10 seconds to consider it at a time, then another, then take 10 seconds of courage to consider researching it. then Do it. Make it happen-because you deserve it & your future self will thank yourself for it. Just 10 seconds at a time, of wise considerations, good decisions & self care, to change your life.

🦄Try to Avoid negative judgement, of yourself & others; & instead take 10 seconds of courage to consider learning about diversity & why some thing’s are the way they are-the root of peoples behaviours & communication.

Take another 10 seconds to consider tackling the root cause of difficulty to make it easier in the future. Broaden your mind. try to not ridicule anyone for a whole day. then two. then a week.

🦄Take 10 seconds to consider how often you say ‘I’ ‘mine’ ‘my’ or ‘me’ everyday. Take another 10 seconds to wonder what this means, & whether you can change or learn from it. ‘We’ ‘us’ ‘our’ ‘together’.

Take 10 seconds to remind yourself that together we are a team, & Together, Everyone Achieves More.

Take another 10 seconds to affirm that You’re not alone. It doesn’t matter how long until you discover this truth- you will; so take 10 seconds every hour to have faith, & make good things happen while you wait.

🦄Take 10 seconds to consider doing a random act of kindness, & imagine for 10 seconds the potentially life changing impact your time may have.

Listen to your loved ones, ask people about their story. Take an interest in something that normally has no impact on you.

talk to acquaintances so they become friends. Laugh, love & Listen to understand, not to respond.

Make Time for loved ones. Make time for yourself.

Take 10 seconds every hour to Consider how people make you feel, & try not to believe anyone who tries to teach you that you’re not worthy or deserving.

Take 10 seconds of each hour thinking about how you could help; Then take as many 10 seconds as needed, to make those dreams possible.

There’s charities & volunteering or fundraisers - take time to talk & take an interest, in the world outside of your own world-the world doesn’t revolve around you, after all-the more we help make positive change in other peoples worlds, the more our own worlds seem to stop spinning out of control.

So take 10 seconds at a time, to change the world.

🦄Take 10 seconds every hour, to remind yourself of why you’re a good person & why you’re worthy. even if the only thing you can think of is that you’re trying-trying your best is perfect-& no one-not even you- can fault you for trying your best. Then consider surrounding yourself with people who make you feel good, & safely letting go of the people who drag you down. It takes 10 seconds of courage at a time to consider making changes, so make each of those 10 seconds count towards you becoming your best self.

It doesn’t matter how many 10 seconds it takes, just take it bit by bit. Take a deep breath & have a think-what are you going to consider changing in the next 10 seconds?

Just remember, when you are overwhelmed, its only 10 seconds, and then you can try again, even if you rest for 10 seconds, or 20 seconds, or 20 hours or days! rest, recover, and then consider how to improve for 10 seconds at a time. Only 10 seconds at a time. You got this. There goes another year! Life’s story can be a rollercoaster of ups and downs, hard and unfair, joyous and light; but we must remember that the story is not over yet... New year, new me?

Naaahhhhhhhh.

But I’ll do my best - 10 seconds at a time!

I’m going to be realistic with goals- my goal is simply that I will TRY my best, NOT that I will achieve.

💫I will try to help others and advocate and deliver speeches and publish my Autism resource book, 10 seconds ay a time, to avoid shutting down or burning out.

💫I will try to list daily/weekly what I’m grateful for, even if I only consider this for 10 seconds at a time, to avoid overwhelm. 

💫I will try to remove negativity from my life while still allowing myself to feel, 10 seconds at a time, of negative, rest, recovery, and then let my self feel, and grow through it, 10 seconds at a time.

💫I will try to message special people in my life more (this is something I really struggle with, even if I want to make contact) even if I only remember for 10 seconds at a time, I need to remind myself in those 10 seconds of my good intentions, even though I usually shutdown or don't process information so struggle with follow through...

💫 I will try to continue exercising regularly & try to heal through movement. ill counts down the seconds as I swim, keep going for 10 seconds, just 10 more seconds! walk to the next tree, just 10 seconds away! now another 10 seconds!

💫I will try to be positive, mindful, stoic & open to learning new perspectives & new things

💫I will try to make others smile

💫I will try to keep our living space tidier 

💫I will try to make progress everytime I’m out in my wheelchair- even if it’s one half a step more than last time-it’s still progress!

💫I will try to be a better wife (although if you ask hubbie I’m already a saint! pahaha) 

10 seconds at a time.

Life’s story can be a rollercoaster of ups and downs, hard and unfair, joyous and light; but we must remember that the story is not over yet...

 I’m so glad I didn’t give up the millions times I wanted to... It’s been a crazy year with many ups and downs...  remember, even if it’s been tough, and you’re struggling to cope, doesn’t make you worthless or weak... you’re stronger than you may ever know, you survived and you get stronger and wiser with the hardships

As ever I try to focus on the positives, when I’m overwhelmed with the hardships and Un justifications of life, and I try to learn from the negatives; so here are my 5  #2023Highlights 

1, my husband and I celebrated our 5th year wedding anniversary

2, my book ‘#AspergerWorld’, still sells out wherever I go, and still helps people!

3, my #MyAutisticWingsOnTour has been a huge success; with an another international tour to Switzerland delivering autism understanding workshops in schools, blessed with lots of keynote speeches, delivering autism training at nation wide conferences and events and meeting incredible people has been truly wonderful! 

4, Finishing editing and writing my new autism resource book, and getting ready to publish, to help more people!

5, Being so happy and content, managing to love life, travel, be mindful and enjoy the little aspects of life, even as my health spirals (yet again!) into crisis, needing yet another 5 major surgery...

Learning life lessons through hardships:

💫my illness made me stronger & more determined than ever & taught me never to give up & have faith in my ability to prosper through great pain

💫I discovered my value is not in what I can give to people, through volunteering, awards or media stuff- it’s who I am. I can help people because of me-I need to stop seeing hurdles for helping people & burdening myself with shame & guilt that m not as successful helping people anymore … & I think I’m getting there because I now realise that, my existence helps people-because I want to help & try to help. (The same with you-if you want to help & therefore try to help).

💫I have a new appreciation for life - again & again & again.

💫I’ve been terrified, & isolated & desperate & weak & further disabled by my illnesses - I was fast losing hope - these negative feelings that overwhelmed me so often, taught me where my weakness was, where the injustice was that needed fixing, where my anxiety was to calm from & enabled me to problem solve through my fears.

remember, even if it’s been tough, & you’re struggling to cope, doesn’t make you worthless or weak... you’re stronger than you may ever know, you made it - only just, maybe-but YOU did that; no one else. even if you took it 10 seconds at a time, you have hope too, because you did get through those hard times!

 💝 Your story is not over yet - just take it 10 seconds at a time💝

Goodbye #2023, hello 2024!

Peace x